I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
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