He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
