Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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