you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
