Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize
