and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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