Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
