Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
