love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
