I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
