i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I smell like Dick and happiness
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
