found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
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