Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
