He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
