i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize
