i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize