Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Randomize
