Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
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And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
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the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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