But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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