i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Randomize
