Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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