there's paper in my vomit.
if only i could text you this smell
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Randomize
