take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
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I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
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It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
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