i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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