I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
