Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
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I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
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DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
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