I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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