Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
