Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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