I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
In other news, I just burned my penis
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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