Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize
