hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
