I can tuck mytits in my pants
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Reggie can tackle my bush.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize