so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
