you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize