he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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