So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
