Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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