If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Redeem this text for a blowjob
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Randomize