Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
