my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
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