your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
As shirtless as possible
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
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