Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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