im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Randomize