dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
vagina is talking i cant
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
