I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Four minutes until I can fart!
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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