Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
