I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
