pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize
