Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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