"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize