i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
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I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
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I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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