I skipped work to stalk him.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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